wonders

sometimes i feel life just slipping away. I have good days. I have bad days. Some days i am too easily irritated by the love of my life and cant stand to be around anyone frankly. The there are those days were i cling to anyone around me. Bipolar? not sure.  Cant help it i guess. I come off as a bitch sometimes especially to those i love very much. I don't mean to. But its almost as if my fuse is short. I stand and watch one of my closet friends seem so depressed everyday and cant help to wonder if i seem the same. So much of my My past haunts me. Running only makes it worse.....I've already picked up using drinking to make it seem better. And i watch my good friend do it. Its not what makes it better i know that. But cant help but feel sometimes its all i know. It hasn't become a bad habit but i fear it may.